To plan or not to plan?

On TalkMum this week, we're talking about planning for pregnancy. Whilst it's probably a good idea to have a sense of how you want things to happen and when, our blogger Jaxargues that when you're a mum, it's impossible to plan too much!

I understand that there are people who plan their lives ahead. I very much admire them. I try to meal plan our weeks, but that's about as far as I go these days.

I wasn't always quite this chaotic. Or at least, I don't think I was. There was a brief period of time, when I had only one child when I was really quite organised. I held down a nearly full time responsible job. My child was always well turned out (in my terms, at least, which means clean with a change, if not always coordinated!) and we all had clean pressed clothes. The cupboards were full and the house reasonably tidy. Then our much longed for second child came along, and everything went to pot.

Each of my children has been hoped for, if not precisely planned. This means that I did indeed adjust my nutritional intake and make sure I was taking my folic acid, as well as trying to make sure that I was fit and active.

However, with number three, I'd given up hope - having had three miscarriages in three years - so didn't expect to get pregnant and if I did, I didn't expect to keep it. So I'd stopped taking vitamins - which is obviously the time that I then got a sticky pregnancy! I put this down to giving up the stressful job I'd had, although that had helped me lose any spare weight; I've realised that I am far more likely to get pregnant if I'm not carrying any excess weight.

Having had a large gap between numbers two and three, I had slightly forgotten the impact of a baby on day to day life. I don't think I've ever caught up since, as dropping child no four into life with a pre teen, a nine year old and a toddler means I'm not so much running as staggering to catch up! If I ever managed to get far enough ahead of myself to have room for planning, I'd like to reorganise our bedrooms, clothes storage, the living room and the kitchen...but maybe that's a pipe dream.

So, did I plan my pregnancies and children? Not precisely. My life just doesn't seem to work that way. It does sound like a jolly good idea though!

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