New mums; it’s OK to ask for help!

It can be very easy to become overwhelmed when you first become a parent, with so many new things happening all at once (especially when feeding and changing the baby can sometimes take up a whole day!). Here TalkMum Fozia, who blogs over at Muslim Mummy, talks about how it's OK to ask for - and accept - help, especially from your family:

No matter how prepared you think you are, with washed and folded clothes, cot all set up, nursery decorated, nothing fully prepares you for the arrival of your baby. Your life literally changes, but obviously for the better!

It is great being fully prepared, but what will actually be the most useful in this new chapter of life, is accepting help from others if it is available.

No it doesn’t make you a failure, it doesn’t mean you can’t cope. You will end up being grateful for the help you get. Trust me.

Think about it, for 9 months you have carried another life inside you. You may have had a difficult 9 months, then you are physically exhausted by giving birth. You may not even get a chance to rest to allow your body to recover before the sleepless nights start. So if you are lucky enough to have help, I say grab it with open arms.

I have my parents living close by. They wanted me to go stay with them after the baby was born because I had a third degree tear and they wanted to help. I drew the line at going to stay with them as I wanted my own space.

However, I am genuinely grateful for their help. I had to do nothing except feed and change the baby. They took my eldest to school, fed her after school and brought her home. They even brought me and my husband cooked meals so I did not have to cook. My mum would even wash any dishes that my hubby may have left before he went to work. I was able to sleep when baby slept and this I think kept me sane. I further believe that the rest helped my tear heal quickly.

With my first child I was living with my parents. At that time I felt like they thought I could not cope and that is why they were ‘taking over’. Now I now that it was simply because they already knew how exhausting the first few weeks can be, so this time round I was grateful for all the help I could get.

If you do not have family around to help then it is still important to rest as much as you possibly can. Freeze some meals before the due date so you don’t have to cook, don’t stress if the house is in a bit of a state the first week, and if you don’t want visitors the first few days then just say. If they are parents then they will understand.

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